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Jim

アーティスト：King Missile 

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Jim is a new character I just thought of today, but I warn you, don't get too used to him. Don't try to get to know him, don't try to like him, because I'm gonna kill him. That is what I do. I invent people, and then I kill them. Jim walks with a limp, but don't worry about it. It doesn't matter that he does, and it doesn't matter why, because he's going to die. Okay, he was bit by a dog last week, that's why he limps. Okay? And it wasn't his fault at all. Nor is it his fault that he will die. He will die because he had the poor sense to be invented by me. He doesn't deserve to die. He is a nice guy with a lot of friends, and he is helpful and reliable. A lot of people count on him, and they will be sad when he dies in a few moments. And it is too bad for those people. Some of these people will also die, because they count on Jim, and Jim is going to die, and Jim won't be there when they need him, and so they will die too. So it will be a shame for these people. People I also invented. People like Jane, who has no arms. People like Jack, who has lung cancer. People like John, not me, a different John,? who is autistic. Jim is a friend to them all, and he helps them all in countless, invaluable ways. But it doesn't matter. None of it matters. I only bring these things and people up for only two reasons: so that as I write them down, I can think about exactly how Jim will die, and so that his meaningless death will have meaning. Would you like to know what Jim does for a living? So would I, let's see. Jim is independently wealthy. He, he doesn't have to work, but he does anyway. He does volunteer work. He helps out at the cancer ward, and in the section of the hospital where the people who have no arms live. And on the weekends, he works with autistic children like John (not me). Does Jim have a love life? No. He is too busy and too shy. Does Jim have any pets? No. Are Jim's parents still alive? Yes. It will be tragic for them when Jim dies, maybe of a brain hemorrhage, I haven't decided yet. Okay, let's do it. This morning Jim was reading the paper. He was reading an article about the Congo, the country formerly known as Zaire, and he was



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