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A Career In Indierock

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*Knocking* Man: Wh...Who Who's there? Officer: Police officer Sgt. Russo, 17 precinct. Open up. Man: Yeah? Officer: I got a warrant for your arrest. Man: Hey, what is this? Officer: Never mind, you're under arrest. Put your hands up against the wall. Man: Hey! Officer: C'mon, put your hands up against the wall, fucker, don't give me any feedback! Man: What the fuck? Officer: (hits the man) Shut up! Man: Ah! Oww! Officer: C'mon, bring it back and spread'em boy. You're under arrest. You got the right to remain silent. And that's about it. Man: Arrest? What for? Officer: Look... you can make it easy on yourself or rough. Just cooperate! Man: Hey, what are you ow! Officer: Shut up! Like I said, you got a fuckin' warrant. That's all I know. I don't like this any more than you do boy. Man: Ok, ok, ok... Just take it easy ok? Officer: Well, you can make it halfway decent or miserable, that's up to you. Man: Hey, what are you doing? Officer: You know what, man? I got a good mind to break the fucking rules. Yeah. (belches) Man: Hey what, what what's going on? Officer: Right now I'm kinda tryin' to decide weather I should bust you and take you in or maybe make a little deal with ya. Man: Deal? What kind of deal? What is this? Officer: Yeah... The kinda deal where I bust my ass out on the field eight hours a day and risk my fucking life to protect and serve when I got punks like you, that I'm up against all the time. Put your hands up over your head. Man: Hey, what are you doing with those cuffs? Officer: You carrying a weapon? Man: No! Officer: Well let's say it's quite obvious, boy, that you're gonna be handcuffed, how about that, eh? Man: Hey, come on, get your hands off of me! Officer: (Belches) Man: What is? (gets hit) Oww! Officer: Shut up! Man: Ok, ok! Officer: You motherfucker. Yeah! You see this? Man: That badge? Yeah... Officer: That's right, boy, that Badge, this Uniform and these Boots; I'm a uniformed police officer, carrying out an order, watch commander sent me: I'm just doin' my fuckin' job. Man: Ok. Officer: I'm just tryin' to make this easier on both of us. Man: Ok. 2:00 Officer: Put your hands behind your back. Man: Ok. Hey come on, what are you doing with those cuffs? Officer: Next time they tell you to go to court, show up! Like I said: I'm just doin' my job, man yeah yeah You do anything I say, boy, anything. And don't give me a fuckin' hard time. Man: Ok, ok, I won't give you a hard time Officer: Good. Kneel down, c'mon! Man: Kneel down? Officer: Kneel, motherfucker! Man: Ow, ok, ok.! (gets slapped) Officer: Yeah! All right guy yeah. Man: (breathes loudly) Officer: Now you got something to say: spit it out. I had a rough fucking week; my wife's been givin' me a hard time, she can't suck my cock without gettin' the fucking teeth in the way. And I'm a little bit pissed, man. Man: Hey, what is this? Officer: Like I said: it's a bust. A special kind of bust. *Classical piano piece starts to play* Officer: I got a license for it, boy, can you dig it? I do anything I want; I can bring you in, maybe I let you go, how about that, eh? Man: Ok, ok, I'll do what you say, ok, ok. Officer: Did you ever serve a man, boy, huh? Man: What are you talking about? Officer: Gettin' it on, that's what: suckin' cock, lickin' ass! Man: Hey, come on. Officer: Yeah, come on! Tell me how many times you fantasize about a uniformed police officer, boy, huh? Many? That's right, hundred, two hundred? Ever since you were a fuckin' kid you've been dreamin' about this! And now it's comin' true, boy. If you cooperate I'll take the cuffs off and we'll both have a good time. Why give me a hard fuckin' time, man? Man: Cooperate? What do you...? Officer: I work hard for a living boy! (hits the man) Man: (Moans) Ok. Officer: If I want a blowjob you suck, if I want my ass licked you lick! That's what I mean cooperate. Unless you wanna spend the next few days in the clank that's up to you. Unbuckle my belt. Man: I can't the cuffs are on! Officer: You're right! Now what do you think, huh? You think you gonna be able to get into what I'm thinkin' about, eh? Do we both feel about the same thing, eh? How about it boy, did you ever suck a cock? Ever lick an ass? Huh? Man: What do you want me to do? Suck your cock? Officer: You're straight or gay? You got an old lady? Man: Straight Officer: (murmuring) Huh? You're straight, eh. Yeah, about as straight as my fuckin' dick! Nah. Next time you open your mouth it's going to be to say sir: yes, sir, no, sir. Man: Hey what is this? Officer: Shut up! What did I tell you about the yes, sirs, no, sirs boy? (starts hitting) Man: (Moans and gets hit) Officer: Yeah! Man: Ok! Yes, sir. Officer: I'm a big man! Man: Yes, sir. Officer: I got two hundred pounds of solid muscle behind me. Man: Yes, sir. Officer: Yeah! You could use it to your benefit or whined up lying flat on the floor. You do just what I say, boy. Man: Yes, sir. Officer: And if I uncuff you are you gonna... Yeah, you gonna do just what I want you to do or would you rather spend a coupla days in jail? Man: Ok, I'll, I'll, I'll do what you say. Officer: All right, boy... I've been prancin' around in this fuckin' uniform all day long. The heat's been gettin' to me; the sun heats up my badge and makes it hot, sometimes I can feel the stinging on my chest. That badge is pinned onto my uniform. I just might decide to take it off and pin it into your tits! You'd love it wouldn't ya? You'd love it wouldn't ya, boy!? Eh? Man: N-No... Officer: You'd love it! (hits the man) Wouldn't ya? Man: (moans) Yes, sir yes, sir yes, sir... Officer: Unless you rather get your fuckin' face punched in, you better a.... Man: Ok, ok... Officer: That's right... That's more like it. You better yield the right away. Man: Ok. Officer: Yeah! Man: Just undo the cuffs. Just undo the cuffs. Officer: Amen. I'll undo'em when I want to! If I'm gettin' more feedback outta you and I just might make them a little tighter! I'll take'em off your wrists, but I'm gonna put'em back on in about two minutes. On your balls! Stand up, punk! Come on. Now drop your fucking pants. Yeah! I'm an officer of the law: respect it! Yeah, boy... I used to be on the highway patrol. Then some punk fucker like you had to go and tell some song and dance story about how I sexually abused him. Got a fuckin' two-week suspension, but now I'm back on duty. Gotta make up for my lost time. Kinda miss gettin' laid. Yeah, stick those balls and cock up, boy, I'm gonna cuff'em. Man: Ow! Officer: Yeah, shut up, punk! Shut up! You rather I kicked you in the nuts? Man: No, no! Officer: Now just stand there, stand there and accept it. Yeah! Man: Ow! It's too tight! Officer: Too tight!? How can you get a motherfucker hard on you, punk? (slaps man) Man: (moans) Officer: Shut up! Don't complain! Do what I want you to do and do it right and I just might let you go free! Man: Yes, sir. Officer: How about that, eh? I got the pull! I can dump the records. Yeah... Man: What do you want me to do? Officer: Start off by unbuttoning my shirt! Take the badge off first. Yeah. Do you see that pin? Eh? Yeah. How about I stick it through your tits, man? Or at least one of them just in case you get outta line I can tug on it and put you back in place. Man: Yes, sir. Officer: Yeah, boy. Man: Yes, sir. Officer: For a guy that doesn't seem to know what the hell is goin' on you got a pretty hard cock. Now, boy, get unbuttoning my shirt, come on: start from the top and work it down. Man: Ok. Officer: Ok, Sir! Man: Ok, sir. Officer: That's more like it. Man: So what you get busted for, boy? I didn't make the arrest, I'm just issuing the warrant. Just an apprehension? C'mon, spit it out, what'd you do, suck somebody's cock and get caught? Nah, I won't put it past you. Now kneel down, c'mon. Man: Yes, sir. Officer: Like I said: I've had this fuckin' uniform on all day long. I'm hot, I'm sweaty; I need a break. Man: Yeah. Officer: Unbuckle the belt. Man: Yes, sir. Officer: That's it boy. Now take off that fuckin' sweatshirt pull it off. Let me see those tits. Unzip the zipper (slaps the man) Man: Ow! Officer: With your teeth! What the hell d'ya think you are putting your fuckin' hands on me, criminal! Yeah, boy! You ain't got no fucking rights! Yeah... Man: Yeah. Officer: Yeah motherfucker. Man: Yeah. 9:00 Officer: Now why don't you take those motorcycle boots off for me: I feel kinda hot and sweaty too! Man: Yes, sir. Officer: That's it, punk. Right on. Undo the holster. Real easy. Yeah. Right on. Now pull my service revolver out of my holster, boy. Toss the ware in the bed. that's it. Yeah. Get a lotta accidental shootings, yeh, I been on the force for ten years, happens all the time, so



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